Gloom in the air,
All over my lair.
Heart so frail,
In torment I wail.
Memories so strong,
None did I wrong.
Screams deep inside,
Abandoned pillow beside.
Walls echo her giggles,
Accentuate my struggles.
Quilt holds her scent,
In my heart a dent.
Teddy that she hugged,
Broods feeling snubbed.
Letters from her kindred,
Lies scattered unread.
Backyard that she admired,
Wonders where she retired.
Plants that she mothered,
Now fall withered.
Kitty that she petted,
Meows feeling gutted.
Violin that she plays,
Now untouched it lays.
Her phone that rings,
Now in silence it sings.
Her alarm that screams,
Lost its voice it seems.
I look out the window,
For my lost rainbow.
Heart beats bloodless,
Soul feels lifeless.
As the woman I crave,
Now sleeps in her grave.
That’s a heart-breakingly beautiful piece! Loved how you added on to the little detailings like ringtone, alarm. The rhymings were on point. They took the flow of the poem to a different level. ❤️
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Thank you so much Hema 🙂 Very pleased to hear that 🙂 Really appreciate your comments 🙂
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Wow! Vignesh, I LOVED this moving and touching piece. Perfect flow. Excellent.❤️
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Thank you so much Grace 🙂 Appreciate your comments 🙂
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Truly my pleasure.💕
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This is amazing, Vignesh.
Btw… I loved these lines…”Walls echo her giggles”
Keep it up!!
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Thank you so much Komaljeet 🙂 So happy to hear that 🙂
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wow vignesh Amazing piece. Rightly the rhyme king✌♥
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Thank you so much 🙂 Ha ha, that is a generous compliment 🙂 Really appreciate it 🙂
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Sorry
So sorry
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Oh don’t be, this is entirely fictional 🙂
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What?…
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Oh you had commented that you were sorry. I thought you assumed that this poem was personal 🙂
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Yes I did. It felt like it came from a place of deep grief
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oh chilling Vignesh! Great job🌷🌷🌷
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Thank you so much Cindy 🙂
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You’re so welcome Vignesh!💕
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Wow Vignesh, this is heartbreakingly beautiful. What a powerful piece. And your rhyming deserves a standing ovation, it totally adds such a wonderful flow! Incredibly well done 🖤🤗
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Thank you so much Ace 🙂 You are very generous with your compliments 🙂 Really appreciate it 🙂
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Very poignant, Vignesh. The pain comes through so movingly via the rhyming couplets.
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Thank you so much Punam 🙂 Really appreciate your comments 🙂
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My pleasure. 🙂
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Heartbreakingly beautiful, Vignesh. You managed to portray such depth of emotions so beautifully. Great job!
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Thank you so much Shweta 🙂 Really appreciate your comments 🙂
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This is exactly the kind of poem that I will never be able to mewrite. This was too good 😭❤. I loved the rhymes and the writing structure. It had so much depth to it, and this was just so heartfelt!!!!!
Also, if you don’t mind me asking, is it fiction?
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Thank you so much Nehal 🙂 You will be able to write too if you put your mind to it 🙂 You just need to trust yourself and spend some time on it 🙂
Oh yes, it is completely fictional 🙂
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Oh ok, good to know that.
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that’s heavy… very heavy
touched don’t touch, voice
his/hers not mine, Christ
salted teąrs dried, I die
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Thank you so much alec 🙂
I always admire your poetic responses. They are short, yet very impactful 🙂
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Very poignant, a heartfelt loss
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Thank you so much 🙂 It is entirely fictional though 🙂
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That’s what makes it so good, the realism
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Thank you once again 🙂
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congrats on a masterful wordsmithing piece! Couplets are my favourite form of poetry and this is seamless 🙂
You take us on an emotional ride, revealing more as each line unfolds, lovely! It’s deeply sad but I feel that is due to your talent rather than a real loss, I hope 🙂
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Thank you so much Kate 🙂 You are very generous with your comments 🙂 Really appreciate it 🙂
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I only ever tell the truth and always keen to support genuine talent 🙂
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That’s very kind of you Kate 🙂
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Damn, this gave me chills. This was really heartbreaking and sad. There were some really exceptional lines in there and you deserve a lot of credit for that rhyming scheme, it’s never easy. I even love the title and the picture you used for this. This felt a lot heavier in the end. Amazing, Vignesh! You’ve outdone yourself here.
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Thank you so much AB 🙂 So touched by your kind comments 🙂 Really appreciate it 🙂
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You’re so welcome 🙂
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My word! Vignesh, you knocked this out of the park 💔👏
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Thank you so much Bree 🙂 Very pleased to hear it 🙂
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Extremely sad, Vignesh. She has left her mark everywhere. Even upon the heart of the reader.
Beautifully written. 🙂
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*wow* I could feel every single line. So much pain yet so beautiful.
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Thank you so much Moksha 🙂
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Nicely penned.. keep your good work..👍
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Thank you so much Nandhini 🙂
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Beautifully written Vignesh !
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Awesome written!!!👍🏻👌🏻🐰
Dark house boo💀🙀
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Heart breaking. Beautifully penned
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Thank you so much Tanvir 🙂
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This is so heartbreaking Vignesh. But you composed it so well. Loved the seamless rhyme to the verses.
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Thank you so much Radhika 🙂
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Beautiful piece 🙂🌼
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Thank you so much Gayatri 🙂
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This is so deeply touching beautiful.
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Thank you so much PD 🙂
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So touching, her life brilliantly portrayed, will definitely be missed by many.
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Thank you so much Usha 🙂
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My pleasure.
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OH. OH. That last line took my breath away. Like a punch in the gut. Well done, Vignesh.
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Thank you so much Rosema 🙂
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Beautiful!
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Very emotional and felt like crying….penned the feelings beautifully..
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